The Brightest Rose

I was going to write about the Earth Day project Lily did today, but then she did something that in my opinion was remarkable. She wrote (dictated while I wrote) her first poem, and it was for me and Heather. Lily titled it "The Brightest Rose", and I'm copying it with her permission below.


It's as sweet as a rose
And I love you so much.
And I sing for you,
And I love to write poems for you.
I love you Mommy and Daddy.

I will squeeze you so much,
And I will hug you so much,
And I will pick you a flower outside in our backyard,
And I love you Mommy and Daddy.


I count myself among the most fortunate of men to have such a thoughtful and clever girl.

It reminds me of something Shakespeare wrote:

"How much more praise deserv’d thy beauty’s use,
If thou couldst answer, “This fair child of mine
Shall sum my count, and make my old excuse,”
Proving his beauty by succession thine.
This were to be new made when thou art old,
And see thy blood warm when thou feel’st it cold."

Perhaps I speak from vanity, but I am very proud of the legacy I see in Lily. She makes the world a better place. I'm a lucky dad.

3:40 a.m.

I could complain that I'm awake at 3:40 a.m., but I'm not going to. It's quiet and cool, and I get to enjoy my thoughts while I patrol campus.

Some might consider these the dark hours when crime is afoot and bad guys abound. While my job is to deter these darker elements of society from committing their wrongs on our campus, I simultaneously notice the various flowers half-blooming under artificial light.

I recall "The Noble Nature" by Ben Jonson which reminds us that "In small proportions we just beauties see, and in short measures life may perfect be."

Cheers

Ch-ch-ch-changes

A lot has changed since my last entry. I am now a patrol officer at a local university. Some people think this means I'm a cop, but a lot more goes into being a cop than the prep work I did to get promoted.

That being said, at this time last year, I never would have thought that I'd be doing what I'm doing now. I had a feeling I wouldn't be teaching anymore. Not because I hated teaching, but because I hated all the politics of the public education culture. It was a game that I was bad at playing, regardless of my teaching abilities. Hence my departure from that realm.

Before you begin thinking this is a pity party, it's not. It's a statement about how fortunate I am to have a wife who is a master at social networking. It's a statement about how lucky I am to be in a position that I've wanted to be in my whole life... A job that I don't have to take home with me. A job that has a great retirement package. A job that allows me to go to school for free as long as I am an employee... A dream I've had since high school. I remember telling one of my high school teachers that I wanted to have as many letters after my name as possible. Now, by way of some unexpected turns of events, that dream is a reality.

On top of all this is the added bonus that in a few years, Heather and Lily get to go to school for free too. What more could a man ask for for his family?

Sure, I have to work some funky hours, but so far, that's been the worst part of my new job. If that's the worst of it, I can handle it. I'm less stressed than I've been in a long time, and now that I've completed my application, I'll be a college student again in a matter of a few months.

Lesson here: transitions may suck, but you never know what kinds of green pastures lay ahead. As the magnificent Monty Python troupe implores us, always look on the bright side of life.

Villanelle 11/26/11

This is my first villanelle since high school, so while criticism is welcome, please be gentle.  Cheers!

Follow thy bliss and learn all that you can

Read, discuss, and open up your mind

Do your own part to raise the race of man

Then look into your heart to understand

Your motives. Caution! Keep them true and kind;

Follow thy bliss and learn all that you can

Then breed some more of thee, per Nature’s plan,

In them your love and knowledge leave behind;

Do your own part to raise the race of man.

Strong Passion’s pushed us on since time began

But self-love must with reason be entwined

Follow thy bliss and learn all that you can

Err on the side of love throughout thy span

Both mind and heart teach wisdom when aligned

Do your own part to raise the race of man

Thy goal, dear friend, as o’er your life you scan

Shall be to say, “I kept man from decline.”

Follow thy bliss and learn all that you can;

Do your own part to raise the race of man.

How to Increase Your (Perceived) Productivity Around the House

I've heard it said that “perception is reality”.  When it comes to cleaning the house, this is pretty much true, and you can save yourself some spousal stress by following some of the tips below.  They are designed (mostly for men) to make it appear that you are doing a lot more around the house, even though you’re just adding a few minor chores to all of the other outdoor (and possible indoor) things you take care of that may not get noticed. 

Doing the dishes

If you only have a few minutes to do some dishes, and you know this is something that will get commented on right before bed when you are winding down and someone else is doing their final analysis, get the big surface area dishes done first and clear up some counter/sink space.  The best dishes to start with are:

1.        Cutting boards

2.       Plates

3.       Pots and pans

After doing these, if you have time, get the silverware rinsed and put away in the dishwasher.  Then stack the bowls and cups in the sink for later.  You can clear off an entire counter plus maybe half the sink and the kitchen won’t look quite so untidy.  Wiping down the counter with a scented kitchen wipe adds a nice touch, too.  This might get you through until tomorrow to finish the bowls and cups. 

Folding the laundry

Same principle applies here.  Do big surface area items first.  Towels, t-shirts, and pants.  Easy to fold, and they take up a lot of space.  Then take whatever is left over, put it in another basket, and you’ve just cleared the house of one basket of laundry.  Consolidation is an important idea when you are trying to look like you’re stepping it up around the house. 

Dirty clothes – Be picky

If you have hampers of dirty laundry piling up, choose what you wash wisely.  Include some of the big items listed above (towels, t-shirts), throw in all of your spouse’s panties and bras (these don’t need folding and expedite the process), then maybe toss in some of your jeans and shorts which are easy to fold later and take up a lot of space. 

Hopefully these quick tips will help you dodge some verbal (or nonverbal) bullets from your better half.  If you have some lavender boiling when your significant other gets home, it makes them feel like they’re walking into a spa, which creates a pretty awesome distraction.  If you have lavender handy, and you haven’t gotten as much done as you’d hoped, this is a tricky little maneuver that might get you off the hook.. 

Best wishes, good luck, and happy cleaning, gentlemen.  

My Fitness Pal = Flatter Stomach + Cleaner House

So I’ve been slightly less than obsessed with My Fitness Pal lately. It’s a website/app that allows you to log in foods you eat and exercise you perform each day.  You basically enter a goal weight, how much you intend to exercise each week, and it gives you a calorie goal for each day (which also averages out for the week). There are pros and cons to it, but mostly pros, so I’ll just start off by stating the one negative, in my opinion.

Entering everything you eat.

This gets to be a pretty tedious undertaking, and takes up a lot of time.  They recently upgraded the app to allow you to scan bar codes, however, which saves a ton of time.  The biggest thing that sucks for me about entering in all the food I eat is that I feel like I’m always picking up my iPhone, and I feel guilty when Lily sees me on it all the time.  I try to limit my time with the phone in front of Lily, but when I’m eating, I need to enter my food or I’ll forget.

Now for the positives. 

One of the biggest positives for me as far as being a role model for Lily is that Heather and I have been much more conscious of what we’re eating and we are talking about it more.  Lily sees us eating out a little less, and eating a LOT more fruits and veggies.  Luckily, Lily’s always liked veggies, and isn’t averse to trying new things.  She loves French fries, but she also loves baked sweet potato fries (orange French fries to her), which are much healthier.   

Another positive to using My Fitness Pal is that you pretty much have to be more active/workout every day to reach your calorie goal.  When I first started using the app, I had just started running a lot.  I would run for thirty to forty minutes three times a week, and that was pretty much all I was logging in for my exercise.  This was great for my calorie goal on the days I ran, but not so much on the days when I didn’t.  So I started to think about some of the other things I do (or COULD be doing) around the house to just be more active and helpful, like doing the dishes, gardening, walking the dogs, cleaning up around the house/yard, etc.  Turns out, a lot of these activities show up in My Fitness Pal as cardio activities, and if they don’t, they might show up on the Health Status calorie calculator, where you can enter your weight and the amount of time doing an activity.  You can then add the activity and calories burned doing that activity on the My Fitness Pal website or app.

At first I felt like I was cheating when I entered calories for doing the dishes or walking around at the grocery store or cleaning the house, because I felt like these were things I should be doing anyway.  Then I started thinking about the difference between a “sedentary” and an “active” lifestyle, and the guilt went away instantly.  I’m basically increasing the activity in my life so I can be healthier, and, most importantly, Lily is seeing this and is a part of it.  She sees Mommy and Daddy riding their bikes to the store that is one mile away instead of getting in the car to drive.  She sees Mommy and Daddy preparing (and growing) veggies and fruits at home more.  She even likes to hang from the portable pull-up bar in the kitchen doorway and do assisted pull-ups because she sees Mommy and Daddy doing them. 

Lily probably hasn’t noticed that Daddy has lost over ten pounds in the last two months since I started using My Fitness Pal, but she has probably noticed an increase in the level of activity in our family.  I know from experience that these kinds of things stick.  I was raised in a pretty healthy home.  Good nutrition was encouraged by my mom, and I remember my dad going jogging all the time and letting me join him when I wanted to, even though I probably slowed him down a bit.  These practices are now getting passed on to my little girl, so I guess this blog is becoming a thank you to my parents, as well. 

Thanks Mom and Papa for letting me see you make healthy choices. 

Also, just as a side-note:  I know it’s easy to get into a mode of obsession with skinniness and beauty and all of that.  This is not something we are promoting in our household by starting to exercise more and eat healthier/less food.  The point of this whole thing is promoting good health, and that’s what we emphasize in our conversations with each other and with Lily.  We never talk about whether it’s better to be skinny or pretty or cute or ugly or anything like that.  In addition to making healthy choices, Lily’s also being encouraged to value being a kind friend, a smart reader, a creative chef, an imaginative painter, an environmentally-conscious citizen, a curious scientist, and a good decision-maker.  No empty-headed pretty faces in this house… just full-headed ones. :) 

Thanks for being a good role model, Mommy. 

To keep the body in good health is a duty... otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear. 
Buddha     

 
Albert Einstein 

Scared of the Dark

I just experienced my favorite part of the day – putting Lily to bed.  I love reading to her and talking to her about the books and listening to her ask smart questions and make funny comments about the day.  I love having her close to me sitting in my lap.  I love singing songs to her to help her relax.  I just make up words about Lily to songs I like.  Her favorite is when I sing “Lily you’re my special girl, and I will always love you” to the tune of Built to Spill’s “The Weather”.  Beautiful song, and I highly recommend personalizing a love song to your child to it.   

Lately, Lily has told me a few times that she is scared of the dark, or as she says it “I’m scared b’of the dark.”  I think she’s combining “about” and “of”, but it’s cute, so I don’t care to correct her, I just repeat what she says, but correctly.  What’s important to me is that my little girl is afraid of the dark.  She's at an age where her imagination is in overdrive, and it's hard to separate perceptions from reality, and that can get pretty darn scary.  This is where Mr. Bear comes in handy.  Having a teddy bear has been invaluable.  He becomes whatever we need him to be.  Sometimes he is a playmate.  Sometimes he helps mommy and daddy convince Lily that she needs a bath.  And sometimes, he is her nighttime protector. 

I’ve told Lily recently that Mr. Bear keeps her safe at night, and that he has a lot of help from his army of bears, which includes a pristine twin brother (who isn’t exactly a twin anymore because he still possesses a nose, and all of his stuffing is still firm).  There have been a few times lately, however, when Mr. Bear just hasn’t been enough, and tonight was one of those nights. 

So what did I do? 

I tapped into the imaginative spirit that Lily has right now.  Into her ability to suspend reality.  Into her (temporary) belief that I am all-powerful and all-knowing.  I sprayed “Safe Juice” around the room.  Sounds messy, I know.  Sounds like a hassle to have to make “Safe Juice” and keep it handy, but it’s fast, easy to use, and (so far) 100% effective.  When Lily told me she was “scared b’of the dark”, I asked her if she wanted me to make her room safe with "Safe Juice".  After getting her permission to use this amazing product, I followed the “Safe Juice (Basic Style)” instructions precisely, and I’m writing today to let you know how you too can get your terrified toddler to drift off to a safe and serene sleepytime. 

Safe Juice Instructions (Basic)

1.        Pretend you are holding a spray bottle, with your index finger bent to simulate “trigger squirting action”©

2.       Go to all the dark corners of your child’s room, utilizing the patented “trigger squirting action”© as often as necessary. 

3.       Spray a little extra over your child’s bed.

4.       Ask your child if there are any areas that you missed, then be sure to protect those areas with extra  “Safe Juice”

5.       Repeat if necessary. 

Safe Juice Instructions (Deluxe)

1.        Use an actual empty spray bottle. 

2.       Repeat Steps 2-5 of the Basic Instructions.

Safe Juice Instructions (Premium)

1.        Use a spray bottle that has water in it. Feeling an actual mist might help to convince your incredulous kid that some kind of change is really happening to their room. 

2.       Repeat Steps 2-5 of the Basic Instructions.

Safe Juice Instructions (Extreme)

 If your kid is super skeptical, you may have to pull out the big guns.  In this rare case, I recommend the following steps. 

1.        Spray some kind of mild air freshener, preferably lavender scented, in the air so your child can smell the safety breezing its way through the bedroom.  Lavender has been said to have a soothing effect, hence the scent recommendation.  I’ve recently been boiling lavender flowers in water because for some reason, smells from the kitchen get kinda trapped in Lily’s room, so I use that to my advantage.  Having a soothing smell actually enter the room as a result of the protective action you're taking may transform the room from scary to safe for even the most skeptical.    

2.       Repeat steps 2-5 of the Basic Instructions. 

Don’t be surprised if you get subsequent requests from your child to “make my room safe”.  This technique is effective, and, along with some good night kisses and hugs, will help your child sleep a little more soundly, even if they’re just a little bit “scared b’of the dark.”